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He's a headless chicken and quite selfish at times. League One teams don't seem as troubled by him as League Two teams did.

Big Papi doesn't seem like a guy to be trifled with although by the sounds of it he'd probably love trifle.

I hope you've bought a seat for each arse cheek and please keep the hollering and yeehaws to a minimum.

A lot of the allure in supporting your football team is the intense rivalry and threat of violence, especially on away days. Sitting amongst rival football fans and celebrating is commendable but don't react with surprise when you're met with hostility. Rival rugby fans sit together and...

I feel like Stevie Wonder because I didn't see that coming.

McNulty's agent must be one smooth motherf*cker. Selling a player to a club that didn't even want him while collecting a nice fee. Cash back!

I went to the university of hard knocks my friend and I'm still studying pretty damn hard.

It may be pleasing on the eye but at this level trying to play like Barca is redundant when your strikers couldn't finish a KFC snack box.

The team aren't getting overly positive results so why would the fanbase remain positive? It's a results business for the love of f*ck!

They used to call me jazz hands in Uni or was it jizz hands? I can remember but I was well cool.

Since he did the hardest men documentaries everyone knows he's a soft mockney. It's played out ironically now.

As my doctor told me, a pump a day keeps the murderous thoughts at bay.

Absolute nonsense. Mashups like today is what makes Britain great. If you want safety and "fun" go to the wasps games you massive womble.

I hope he does. It's an excellent stress reliever.

Well the jokes on them because Jimmy was cremated.

He looks good until he's in front of goal and he goes to shit. He might need a few to get his confidence up but maybe he's just not a great finisher. We shall see.

To suggest that fellatio knocks ones teeth out is not only totally incorrect but indicative of some weird fetish on your behalf.

Chaplin is worryingly toothless.

I was slap bang in the middle of it. Proper nawty. I was minding my own, making my way towards the car park while devouring a Tesco meal deal (Chicken and bacon sarnie, walkers C&O and a bottle of coke) A gang of about 100 Mackems came heavy at me shouting all kinds of Northern abuse I...