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Just entered a blind mans wanking competition..... fuck knows where I came!!

David Blaine's 40 day world record for doing nothing in a box has been broken by Fernando Torres.

It doesn't matter how much the council changes the look of the city centre, you'll still get the pikey chavs walking around with their tramp uniform on (baseball cap, tracksuit top, tracksuit bottoms tucked into black socks and black trainers) unless its above 15 degrees, then they seem to feel...

Went for my routine check up today and everything seemed to be going fine until he stuck his index finger up my arse. Do you think I should change dentists?

Rolled a joint with a page from the Koran yesterday, wow did I get stoned!

Q. What do Tottenham Hotspur and Heather Mills have in common? A. The second leg is just for show.

Win draw win lose lose draw lose

Surely the best way to go is with an uzi 9mm in your right hand, sawn off shotgun in the left, set alight and screaming!!!:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:

Q. What's the best thing to come out of a penis when you stroke it? A. The wrinkles.

i was sad to see eddie stobart dying so early as i thought he would be around for the long haul

"Asked why should anyone invest when the club has no assets? KD - 'Sisu have an option to aquire the stadium. We need to exercise that option. We do need everyone's help, the community and the council to secure this facility." It's a bloody fundraiser!! Sky Blues in Need

This is like watching City - you delude yourself into thinking something good will happen then you come out at the end no better off, if not worse than when we started.

Riley's? They've got about 10 dart boards now so I'd expect they sell the accessories.

Big deal about nothing by the sounds of it. Shock/Horror, we're not going into administration, but we don't have any money either. Tell us something new!!