Sarah Everard (8 Viewers)

Otis · Mar 12, 2021

I don't know where these figures have come from, but someone on BBC Breakfast has said that some research has been done and that one in three men had made sexual harassing comments to a woman in the past month alone.

That's awful.

And also, can I just add, I feel so very sorry for that woman. My heart goes out to her. No idea what she has done to deserve that level of abuse.

stupot07 · Mar 12, 2021

Otis said:
I don't know where these figures have come from, but someone on BBC Breakfast has said that some research has been done and that one in three men had made sexual harassing comments to a woman in the past month alone.

That's awful.

And also, can I just add, I feel so very sorry for that woman. My heart goes out to her. No idea what she has done to deserve that level of abuse.

I'm appalled, and I feel that I have been niave. Talking to my missus, I had no idea about what goes on, what women have been subjected to, especially the daily low level stuff that grinds them down and how scared they are. I just assumed that because I'm thoughtful and respectful towards women, everyone was.

I'm embarrassed to be a man, and I will certainly be calling out inappropriate behaviour and doing what I can to make women feel safe.

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Nick · Mar 12, 2021

Otis said:
I don't know where these figures have come from, but someone on BBC Breakfast has said that some research has been done and that one in three men had made sexual harassing comments to a woman in the past month alone.

That's awful.

And also, can I just add, I feel so very sorry for that woman. My heart goes out to her. No idea what she has done to deserve that level of abuse.

I guess it depends on what is classed as sexually harassing for them to get the stat? It could well be a bloke saying to his missus to get her tits out or something joking or if it is men approaching random women in the street and saying it.

Nick · Mar 12, 2021

stupot07 said:
I'm embarrassed to be a man

You shouldn't be...

chiefdave · Mar 12, 2021

Otis said:
I don't know where these figures have come from, but someone on BBC Breakfast has said that some research has been done and that one in three men had made sexual harassing comments to a woman in the past month alone.

Appreciate the point they're trying to make is its a worse problem than most people are aware of but I struggle to believe those figures, especially at a time when we're all locked up in our houses.

hill83 · Mar 12, 2021

stupot07 said:
I'm appalled, and I feel that I have been niave. Talking to my missus, I had no idea about what goes on, what women have been subjected to, especially the daily low level stuff that grinds them down and how scared they are. I just assumed that because I'm thoughtful and respectful towards women, everyone was.

I sent this article to my ex yesterday saying it was appalling.

Four-fifths of young women in the UK have been sexually harassed, survey finds

Exclusive: YouGov poll reveals extent of abuse and lack of faith in authorities’ ability to deal with it

www.theguardian.com

She replied saying she’s not surprised. She has to think about safety issues that wouldn’t even cross my mind when out and about. I was aware what women face but not fully aware. I’ve called out inappropriate behaviour by my mates and people I know in the past and always get “Hills on one again, chill out mate it’s only a laugh.”

Let’s not pretend we don’t know what the bloke mentality is towards women, there’s a multi page thread on here that demonstrates that.

As for being embarrassed to be a man? No. Bit strong. But getting upset that people are calling for some self reflection and a bit of change? Equally as pathetic.

Ccfcisparks · Mar 12, 2021

How do you eliminate it completely though, the threat of men towards women? Is it possible to reduce it to nil? Theres always going to be those odd nutters about who disrupt the numbers. Maybe its something that'll die down through the generations, like they say will possibly happen to racism. If anything its been stoked up more recently due to social media and the press. I don't envy women and am thankful I'm a man and dont have to face those concerns.

hill83 · Mar 12, 2021

Ccfcisparks said:
How do you eliminate it completely though, the threat of men towards women? Is it possible to reduce it to nil? Theres always going to be those odd nutters about who disrupt the numbers. Maybe its something that'll die down through the generations, like they say will possibly happen to racism. If anything its been stoked up more recently due to social media and the press. I don't envy women and am thankful I'm a man and dont have to face those concerns.

I consider this along similar lines to the race issue and there’s a link between opinions by the same people on both issues. (Across the board not just on here, but I could to a man make a list of everyone who would kick off about this and they all have) Don’t know the answer though. Just don’t be a dickhead would be a start for everyone to consider.

ajsccfc · Mar 12, 2021

Don't do it yourself, try to stop it in others if you can. Probably make a bigger difference than we realise

PVA · Mar 12, 2021

hill83 said:
I consider this along similar lines to the race issue and there’s a link between opinions by the same people on both issues. Don’t know the answer though. Just don’t be a dickhead would be a start for everyone to consider.

Agreed. Unfortunately it seems it's very difficult for those people not to be dickheads.

PVA · Mar 12, 2021

Marty said:
The extreme right have their issues too, no doubt, but they seem to just have a rant and get it off their chest

Bloody hell, where do you even start with this.

Nick · Mar 12, 2021

ajsccfc said:
Don't do it yourself, try to stop it in others if you can. Probably make a bigger difference than we realise

Obviously if your mates are grabbing women then any normal person would probably not be their mate and have a word about it if they go too far and cross the line and are making women feel uncomfortable.

The thing is like Otis stat how extreme towards the "lower end of the scale" does it go to be counted as sexual harassment?

hill83 · Mar 12, 2021

Nick said:
Obviously if your mates are grabbing women then any normal person would probably not be their mate and have a word about it if they go too far and cross the line and are making women feel uncomfortable.

The thing is like Otis stat how extreme towards the "lower end of the scale" does it go to be counted as sexual harassment?

Tits out and up I’d guess. Pretty simple stuff Nick.

PurpleBin · Mar 12, 2021

Earlsdon_Skyblue1 said:
Actually it wasn't Piers Morgan.

I called Ant Middleton an inspiration, after his books helped with my mental health. This person then tagged my old employer and asked them why they employed a racist wife beating sympathiser.

I haven't tweeted since.

That's absolute madness.

PurpleBin · Mar 12, 2021

Evo1883 said:
This is twitter, did she ask her son, did he say that... Or has she seen an opportunity for a virtual pat on the back and some twitter likes .. Il go with the latter View attachment 19127

#DHOTYA.

Nick · Mar 12, 2021

hill83 said:
Tits out and up I’d guess. Pretty simple stuff Nick.

Is it that simple though? This is sort of the issue I mean with the media / social media etc that everything is about the extremes at either end.

As with everything I would just apply common sense and respect, I'm not going to bullshit and say back in the day I never said get your tits out or peeped the horn at a woman. People get older and grow up as well as times changing so it's mostly just common sense and judging the situation.

TomRad85 · Mar 12, 2021

hill83 said:
I sent this article to my ex yesterday saying it was appalling.

Four-fifths of young women in the UK have been sexually harassed, survey finds

Exclusive: YouGov poll reveals extent of abuse and lack of faith in authorities’ ability to deal with it

www.theguardian.com

She replied saying she’s not surprised. She has to think about safety issues that wouldn’t even cross my mind when out and about. I was aware what women face but not fully aware. I’ve called out inappropriate behaviour by my mates and people I know in the past and always get “Hills on one again, chill out mate it’s only a laugh.”

Let’s not pretend we don’t know what the bloke mentality is towards women, that’s a multi page thread on here that demonstrates that.

As for being embarrassed to be a man? No. Bit strong. But getting upset that people are calling for some self reflection and a bit of change? Equally as pathetic.

Sounds like you need a better standard of mates

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PVA · Mar 12, 2021

This sounds a bit ominous, particularly the new padlock bit. Hope there isn't more to come.

"Officers were also carrying out a search on the cliffs in Dover. Miles of tunnels, a maze of rooms and military fortifications were examined by police teams. Officers began searching a disused garage once run by the Couzens family at the top of the white cliffs overlooking Dover harbour. The garage, near the Knights Templar Church, was run by the family for 48 years until 2015.

Metropolitan Police officers examined the entrance to a network of tunnels and a deep shelter running underneath the garage. The entrance is blocked with a metal gate with a new padlock. The tunnels are part of 19th-century ammunition magazine that was extended into a shelter during the Second World War. They also began searching a gun emplacement — St Martin’s Battery — directly in front of the garage.

Officers with specialist electronic search equipment also made a preliminary assessment of the Western Heights of Dover, a massive fortification dating back to the 18th century which can be reached by a footpath from the garage.The fortification, owned by English Heritage, contains hundreds of rooms and passages"

hill83 · Mar 12, 2021

Dave Chappelle does a bit on what women go though. That stuck with me.

Swearing and N word so feel free to swerve it.

jimmyhillsfanclub · Mar 12, 2021

As a society we build the fear of men into women from day one, yet its totally disproportionate to the actual level of threat.

We need to stop doing that.

hill83 · Mar 12, 2021

TomRad85 said:
Sounds like you need a better standard of mates

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Want to be mates?

PVA · Mar 12, 2021

jimmyhillsfanclub said:
As a society we build the fear of men into women from day one, yet its totally disproportionate to the actual level of threat.

We need to stop doing that.

Is it disproportionate though?

"Approximately 85,000 women and 12,000 men (aged 16 - 59) experience rape, attempted rape or sexual assault by penetration in England and Wales alone every year; that's roughly 11 of the most serious sexual offences (of adults alone) every hour. "

Nick · Mar 12, 2021

PVA said:
This sounds a bit ominous, particularly the new padlock bit. Hope there isn't more to come.

"Officers were also carrying out a search on the cliffs in Dover. Miles of tunnels, a maze of rooms and military fortifications were examined by police teams. Officers began searching a disused garage once run by the Couzens family at the top of the white cliffs overlooking Dover harbour. The garage, near the Knights Templar Church, was run by the family for 48 years until 2015.

Metropolitan Police officers examined the entrance to a network of tunnels and a deep shelter running underneath the garage. The entrance is blocked with a metal gate with a new padlock. The tunnels are part of 19th-century ammunition magazine that was extended into a shelter during the Second World War. They also began searching a gun emplacement — St Martin’s Battery — directly in front of the garage.

Officers with specialist electronic search equipment also made a preliminary assessment of the Western Heights of Dover, a massive fortification dating back to the 18th century which can be reached by a footpath from the garage.The fortification, owned by English Heritage, contains hundreds of rooms and passages"

Is this all from the searches the other day?

TomRad85 · Mar 12, 2021

hill83 said:
Want to be mates?

Sure

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jimmyhillsfanclub · Mar 12, 2021

PVA said:
Is it disproportionate though?

In terms of stranger danger, abduction, random attacks etc. yes, it massively is. This is what I meant to be clear.

Nick · Mar 12, 2021

PVA said:
Is it disproportionate though?

"Approximately 85,000 women and 12,000 men (aged 16 - 59) experience rape, attempted rape or sexual assault by penetration in England and Wales alone every year; that's roughly 11 of the most serious sexual offences (of adults alone) every hour. "

I'm sure I saw it somewhere but isn't it that the stranger dragging a woman from a street is actually quite rare compared to when it's actually people doing it to partners, people taking advantage of drunk women who are in no fit state etc. (which obviously is all wrong regardless)

SG21 · Mar 12, 2021

Not the UK, but same logic applies.

hill83 · Mar 12, 2021

Nick said:
Yep, rape is obviously at the other end of the scale but should be taken seriously obviously.

I'm sure I saw it somewhere but isn't it that the stranger dragging a woman from a street is actually quite rare compared to when it's actually people doing it to partners, people taking advantage of drunk women who are in no fit state etc.

That’s reassuring.

skybluesam66 · Mar 12, 2021

jimmyhillsfanclub said:
As a society we build the fear of men into women from day one, yet its totally disproportionate to the actual level of threat.

We need to stop doing that.

A couple of things
1. Many men in senior positions at Boys only schools, already have the fear of interacting with women. It is so archaic now to have single sex schools, but if you dont encounter any women apart from your mum and porn until you are 18 , you can see where the problem is there

2. Women also need to stop using sexual attraction to get on, as that does not help
I interviewed 2 people this week, 1 was gorgeous, but vacant, and used all of the flirty techniques to try to make an impression
The other was just normal, plain but bright as a button

It would be very easy to see how the 1st one would get a job over the 2nd, and that is part of the problem

Nick · Mar 12, 2021

hill83 said:
That’s reassuring.

I just meant in regards to the stranger on the street side of it.

hill83 · Mar 12, 2021

Nick said:
I just meant in regards to the stranger on the street side of it.

Yeah I know, I was joking.

Evo1883 · Mar 12, 2021

TomRad85 said:
Sounds like you need a better standard of mates

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Well yea, I don't know but my mates don't go round harrassing women, for balance I've just asked my missus... Do you ever get harassed by men.. She said no, sometimes when she's out out a bloke will ask her if she wants a drink or if she's single yada yada, basic man wanting to put it on a woman stuff..

Harrass... No

Lads have plenty of Banter amongst themselves on group chats etc...

But 1 in 3? No not for one minute especially in the current climate
I dont believe the media, this goes back to another point about believing the media only when it suits... People do that alot

And lots of people are attention seekers, who will also jump on current trends, harsh but true

Nick · Mar 12, 2021

Evo1883 said:
Well yea, I don't know but my mates don't go round harrassing women, for balance I've just asked my missus... Do you ever get harassed by men.. She said no, sometimes when she's out out a bloke will ask her if she wants a drink or if she's single yada yada, basic man wanting to put it on a woman stuff..

Harrass... No

Lads have plenty of Banter amongst themselves on group chats etc...

But 1 in 3? No not for one minute especially in the current climate
I dont believe the media, this goes back to another point about believing the media only when it suits... People do that alot

Thats what I mean about what gets classed as harassment for the statistics like that.

hill83 · Mar 12, 2021

You’ve also got to consider there will be many people who would like to speak up about stuff like this but haven’t been able to until some sort of event and are now able to. Look at mental health and the thread on this forum as an example. You’d be laughed at even 10 years ago, maybe less. Now it’s considered healthy and normal to talk about.

Deleted member 5849 · Mar 12, 2021

"She said yes, Marlon." Stopping that kind of shit, for a start...

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