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i had quite a large amount of cheese last night just before bed, so at 4.55 this morning I was flying naked around the street whilst being chased by a giant monster, before falling into an endless pit, where all of my teeth fell out (or something like that, I can't remember)

where i normally am at 4.55 in the morning :yawn:

For: they catch people speeding. Against: they catch me speeding.

you run public toilet operation in your own house?

were you planning to write something else on the thread that you created called 'Public toilet hygiene'?

I haven't seen the Apprentice for a few years - was some dick using one? No, I've just watched some bloke chasing some leaves down a street and leav*ing (*ho-ho) them all in a pile at the end, where I guess some other bloke will fire-up his leaf blower and blow them all back again. Sort of...

do you hibernate?

leaf blowers

Bournemouth were able spend the best part of £40M on a midfielder (Lerma) and left-back (Rico) this summer - i.e.quite prepared/able to spend. Not much point in that case selling a proven Wilson for £40M as they would then be looking for a replacement with £40M to spend.

are you a steward?

i literally don't have any tits left

people that say "I hope you're proud of yourself!" no you don't.

don't mention de vore

yeh, 2 hours

Perhaps she's waiting to be kissed by a handsome prince?

I was expecting them to be 100% Linda McCartney

I now only drink ants milk. it takes 0 litres of water to produce 1 litre of ants milk (but it does take fuck-loads of ants)

reminds me of something I heard on TalkShite the other day when they were talking about TV game show hosted by Bradley Walsh (can't remember name of show - don't watch it). One of the questions was something like... What was the name of the footballer who played for Trinidad & Tobago and also...

what did he say to his wife when waving goodbye?

so he's not so bad after all