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I wonder if you can go into a bookies and say 'Excuse me, Derby should have won, will you please pay out?'

One of my favourite ever lines is about cancer. Only Fools and Horses. Goes something like this .. Uncle Albert - 'He died. The big C.' Del Boy - 'Cancer?' Uncle Albert - 'No, the Atlantic Ocean.'

Richard Keogh has Downs Syndrome. Greg was forever making this sort of mistake too.

Hmm. Derby to be promoted. Real Madrid in 90 mins. Not a good start is it. :D Maybe you should change your username to skybluebrokeman.

A whole department in Screwfix I would have thought.

If the right players are available tomorrow, we'll sign them tomorrow If anyone wants to buy any of our players tomorrow, we will sell them tomorrow.

No thanks, I'm driving.

We already have. Our slogan is 'We don't need slogans.'

We wouldn't need the legals without the criminals though. No criminals no legals. :D

Neither did I. Apparently it is though. slope A derogatory term/slur used for the purpose of describing a Vietnamese/Asian person. Describing the slope of their eyes . The Top Gear guys must have known this otherwise why make the joke?The whole point of the joke surely, the double...

This is getting very confusing. :D Surely now anyway, at this stage in the proceedings, there should have been just one simple question and nowt else. Shouldn't be 'Why' or 'Why Not?' Should have just been 'When!' That is the one question we need answering. When are we coming home? Not 'Why...

Die, die, die, Seppala?

28% turnout. Sometimes people get the government and local council they deserve.

Absolute classic!

I'll pop open a bottle of champagne, dance round a bonfire, give 3 cheers and sing ding, dong the witch is dead!! Oh,err .... no, hang on, I did that for Thatcher. Maybe I'll just sit back in my fireside chair with a smug grin on my face whilst watching Homes Under the Hammer or Breaking Bad.

They'd be hacked by people trying to save up for spa weekends though, so that's okay.

You don't trust Mumsnet? :o Where else are you going to get your knitting patterns and fashion tips?

Why, what were you expecting, Mumsnet?

I'm glad we don't have an 'anti flop' policy here. If we did, all the City players would be fined every season for the last 14 years.

Can't wait!!!