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Geez!!! Can we please ban the next person who does a John Harriot tweet link.

Depends how well they know you and also how hungry they are.

I made my first payment in May.

My favourite player at the start of last season. Thought he was brilliant. Now I wouldn't be at all unhappy to see him go.

Ha, yes!

Yeah Thomson and also Thompson. He's good too. We could play Thomson and Thompson if we are hard pressed.

If I was the ref, I'd take one look at Steve Evans and ban him even before the game had started, knowing he'd be trouble.

Not a headline, but a comment within a story. Judges in the US have blocked the release of blueprints on how to make an untraceable 3D-printed gun. US District judge says the blueprints could fall into the wrong hands if released. What a no shit Sherlock statement that truly is. 'Could' fall...

Still prefer 'Mary Berry plays drums for Rick Astley at Camp Bestival'.

- Managers to receive red and yellow cards for misconduct in 2018-19 Warnings in the Premier, but red and yellows cards for managers in the Football League.

Best lock it first, mind.

Yep, he WAS about 50, but is now working backwards, so is about 37 at the moment.

After they've remembered we had a game on.

Yeah, but weren't they dogs?

We've got no replacement striker, everything is very dark and upsetting and we've got zero chance. Zilch, nowt, none. 0-7. We are going down. Probably best to just relegate us now and excuse us from the season. Woe is me.

All the negheads and doom and gloomers on here. We haven't even kicked a ball in anger yet and it's all wailing and gnashing of teeth.

Oh, yeah, I remember that. Famous old story. They took them out of the wrappers, all shoved them up their arses, put them back in the wrappers again and then threw them into our end. Luckily I had brought a packed lunch.

Surely his contract won't be that long will it? Must have an awful lot of clauses and caveats in it if it's that big.

Next door to a polce station and it's got a tracker.