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The worst I've done is swear a lot on the Zero missions in San Andreas. First round of cursing was doing the missions eventually, the second round was when I found out you don't actually need to do them in the first place to move the game on. Damn you Zero, damn you to hell

When I've read people on forums saying that they've broken a controller when throwing it in frustration, even that seems alien to me. If the last mission of Driver on PS1 didn't kill me, nothing will!

I always find that a 'big club' argument consists of whatever vague parameters people want to make up to justify their side of the shouting, often coinciding with the success of 'small' clubs. Personally I'd rather be the successful minnow.

I saw your name and thought 'he can't mention Waggott in here surely', but lo.

Yeah, but one of our players gets injured a lot so people are joking about it.

For real subterfuge you keep multiple accounts, like my glen one.

When he has bursts of inspiration or energy or whatever it is, he looks like he could take on the world. If you had that consistently you'd have one hell of a player, but of course if he had that consistently he'd be nowhere near the bottom of League One too.

Next game he starts, subbed at half-time.

I don't think the league could officially call winning a penalty an assist as that suggests it's something you should go looking for rather than a punishment for the opposition.

As someone who was present at the Ricoh while Marlon King played, I can tell you that there was absolutely not 'thousands' chanting that at all.

The beach party shots seem to be dated from 2011.

Was that one his hat-trick game? Possibly the one match that season I missed. I'm convinced I've got jinx qualities.

Is that Jordan Clarke in there with him in some of those photos?

I remember him as being pretty dangerous and winning a fair number of penalties, although with our success rate from the spot this season that'd be asking for trouble. That Middlesbrough game though, I have him in the 'good signing' pile for that match alone.

I had the SNES version of Sensible Soccer which was ace but not as vast as SWOS. ISS Deluxe had my heart in them days anyway.

Ipswich have washed their hands of him already, he's officially a Coventry City player until the summer and then he's free to do whatever he wants.

You mustn't have been looking too hard, it was an issue that was constantly debated from the point the move was rumoured until even after he'd left. A LOT of people were bothered about it. I doubt a Nimely signing would cause much in the way of boycotting, by comparison.

What is it with you and Waggott, Rupert? You must be responsible for at least half the mentions of his name here.

I could probably come up with a more obscure list, but for some I can't ignore the big franchises as there's a reason they're so successful. I'll do a few for each I've owned instead and please nobody! Commodore 64 - Speedball 2, Creatures 2, World Class Leaderboard SNES - Super Mario Kart...

We're right near the shit. A little run of wins is an exciting prospect of not ending the season shitting ourselves, whereas a dreadful second half collapse with clownshoe defending was a stark reminder that we very well could be. I don't think anyone's going too mental either way to be honest.