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Wilson - 5 - unsure what he could have done about the goals. Kicking and distribution on brand. Bidwell - 6 - Largely solid and unfancy Panzo - 4 - Did some great things and some daft things. I feel like he could be better defensive mid than CB but I've drank lots of wine. Could have gave away...

Game changing moment. Clear second yellow. Come on lads ( I haven't switched off ). I'm in camp bring Tavares on now.

Switching it off now. Lads are all full of turkey, no spark about us today after the first 10 mins. I think the most annoying thing is Sheffield United do not even look particularly good.

It's okay everyone, Liam Kelly is coming on. Hat trick incoming...

Their set pieces have been very good, probably what they do best. I'd take a point if you offered it now...

Why is Gyokeres taking the pens? Hamer clearly strikes a ball much cleaner.

2 up top maybe, but I think I'd stick Waghorn on myself

Every match thread someone says this..

Allen awful

Truly terrible there

If you saw us kick the ball out of play as often as they do, you'd be quiet too.

Fantastic tackle that on Gyok. Great from KP

Bit of credit for Allen there, nice tidying up

Doyle and Bidwell solid there.

I'm happy for them to have more possession based on what I've seen of their final ball. Countering suits us, let's not give away set pieces though...

Poor decision from Sheaf there. Didn't need to do that and was never going to get near the ball.

Some good deliveries from Gus so far. Annoying to lose O Hare but KP looks sharp.

France managed the game well and were able to turn the brief spells they had into something meaningful. Giroud has scored goals everywhere he has gone. He barely has to be involved, but can just find space in the 6 yard box. Did it twice, scored once. Kane seems to want to be involved in the...

Might as well give up now mate, already contacted Guiness, just need to speak to the family across the road so they can verify it.

Slightly off topic but does anyone know what the world record is for the highest number of wanks within one hour? Thanks.