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There was a very shouty kid in there yesterday who was turfed out before three police cars turned up 10 minutes late. Apparently the landlord has had it going on for over a week now, which must be fun.

Sisu - a great bunch of lads

Bigi saving us on the line again I noticed.

When people started going towards the front at full-time and drowning out the safety announcement I had my phone ready to record in case the stewards got a bit heavy, it never occurred to me that people were going to applaud the players. I remember that time we lost to Watford on the last day...

Norwich must have loaned us Jacob Murphy last season as a late apology for charging us money for Cody McDonald.

Call the fire brigade, there's a major burn going on

No way would any new regime start by removing Robins, it'd be an instant step backwards reputation-wise.

Did a pretend fight almost just break out about a pretend queue?

Tagline for the world's worst porn film

They can ask for whatever they want as owners.

Kieran Crowley was the same, saying last summer that he should run the show for us. I was expecting big things.

My main problem with Joe Elliott is that he always seems to be in shorts and I have to bear witness to his mahogany legs.

Gadzhev was decent, which makes it a curiosity how he was left on the bench even when we were the worst team I've ever seen. He did his hair nice and all

Quite uneventful in the end. There was the classic staple of one guy getting past the stewards, quickly realising he's alone with nobody chasing him and then not really knowing what to do next.

Just shout cunts and worms and they'll understand, wise up!

The game last season where we battered whoever was our rivals at the top (Gillingham maybe?) and I felt a sense of both disbelief and genuine optimism for the first time in years. There was a league cup game where Scott Dann equalised at the death too, I thought it was West Ham but reading...

Yeah, loved that and Musee Rodin. Didn't bother with the Louvre as the idea alone seemed too tiring

Well judged

My sources tell me that the reason Joy Sepalla insists on communication in writing only is because she once wasted five hours waiting for Michael Byng to get his Skype working

I'm saying yes. When we had that march from Gosford Park a radio man asked me if I thought we'd be back at the Ricoh that season and I said no way, so it's possible I have jinx powers.