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What the absolute fuck are we doing there?

Yeah, offside. Southgate out! Useless!

Southgate's a fucken genius! Will he be offside?

Surely he's at least read them the riot act? Surely? Ah, it's Southgate. Who am I kidding.

Will he change it at half time? Has he got the bollocks for it?

We look like we couldn't open a tin of beans, let alone this defence.

Can't say we haven't had warnings. All half, they've been threatening. Now we're going to have to see something, our usual game plan is out the window now.

Yeah, someone's getting sent off today aren't they....

Bloody hell, our fullbacks haven't got a clue what's going on.

We've started well.... I don't think

Verstappen back to his old tricks again, can't take being overtaken on track.

That should seal it

Now he's booked Bah for an absolute nothing?

Not sure there was really much he could do about that

Think they might be going off, that thunder was pretty loud.

What was that ruled out for? Any chance of a replay?

I mean, as European anthems go, I like it. It did get a bit boring, mind you, when you heard for the thousandth time because Michael Schumacher won again!

Think VAR would have ruled it out anyway if he'd put it in.

Wow, what a start to the second half for Switzerland!

Bit of a scuffle in the Turkey game, someone sent off after the whistle.