The woman of your dreams is coming over for dinner in an hour, what do you cook? (1 Viewer)

[CovInEssex]

She'll sleep with you if she enjoys it, apparently

 

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[Otis]

Leek and mushroom pie.

Is an hour enough?

 

[robbieray]

skip savoury, just something with chocolate.I could smother my dick in it but it would take her ages to lick it clean

 

[wingy]

skip savoury, just something with chocolate.I could smother my dick in it but it would take her ages to lick it clean

Yeah straight into dessert .

 

[Otis]

Yeah straight into dessert .

Yeah, straight into a bath of dessert.

 

[CovInEssex]

skip savoury, just something with chocolate.I could smother my dick in it but it would take her ages to lick it clean

You know how to wine and dine and.bird don't you

 

[CovInEssex]

Leek and mushroom pie.

Is an hour enough?

That's the point, you've only got an hour. Don't think you could make that, in that time. From scratch anyway

 

[Nick]

skip savoury, just something with chocolate.I could smother my dick in it but it would take her ages to lick it clean

Nah just make sure you have the tweezers and telescope ready and you could get her into it quicker

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

Rib eye steak seared in the pan for 3 minutes either side
Then wrapped in tin foil with mushrooms for 15 minutes
A fresh salad and homemade coleslaw

Plus 2 bottles of wine​

 

[CovInEssex]

Rib eye steak seared in the pan for 3 minutes either side
Then wrapped in tin foil with mushrooms for 15 minutes
A fresh salad and homemade coleslaw

Plus 2 bottles of wine​

Steak is a good idea

 

[Otis]

Maybe I could tempt her with a puy lentil soup.

 

[robbieray]

Rib eye steak seared in the pan for 3 minutes either side
Then wrapped in tin foil with mushrooms for 15 minutes
A fresh salad and homemade coleslaw

Plus 2 bottles of wine​

Mmm can I come round instead of the woman

 

[Otis]

You giving or receiving?

 

[robbieray]

Nah just make sure you have the tweezers and telescope ready and you could get her into it quicker

Its that big me ma used to pick me up out the pram with it

 

[Otis]

And mine's so small for the first 5 years my mum thought it was a clitoris.

 

[Otis]

This is me when I was 4.

 

[Johnnythespider]

Steak is a good idea

It's the 2 bottles of wine that seal the deal

 

[richnrg]

a sausage in cider

 

[ajsccfc]

My dreams would never involve cooking so she turns up with a pizza.

 

[Liquid Gold]

Rohypnol

 

[Otis]

Rohypnol

For me I think it would be Rohyp-replacement-hol

 

[Houchens Head]

Bag of crisps and get yer kit off!

 

[Otis]

Err.....okay, but what time's the woman coming round?

 

[tom88]

Dominos takeaway

Don’t set bar to high

 

[Astute]

It must be my age but I would have more fun having a fart in the bath.

And I don't think the wife would let her in either.

 

[Otis]

Dominos takeaway

Don’t set bar to high

Why? A little short arsed lady is she?

 

[Otis]

It must be my age but I would have more fun having a fart in the bath.

And I don't think the wife would let her in either.

Not after you've farted in there, no.

 

[Johnnythespider]

Dominos takeaway

Don’t set bar to high

Or too low

 

[wingy]

Why? A little short arsed lady is she?

Not in those killer heels.

 

[Otis]

Not in those killer heels.

Thought they were kitten heels?

 

[Gazolba]

Fresh strawberries dipped in chocolate. Always works (or so I've heard).

 

[Otis]

Fresh strawberries dipped in chocolate. Always works (or so I've heard).

When you say 'dipped in chocolate ' you do mean what I think you mean don't you?

 

[wingy]

When you say 'dipped in chocolate ' you do mean what I think you mean don't you?

Yes and it has to be plain chocolate
None of that fatty ,milky other stuff.