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Do your saying it’s not as straight forward as your mate is trying to make out.

You got the rubber stamp of bullshit on that one. A like from Grendull.

What if a woman goes into premature labour on a plain? Is that child native to the country who’s airspace the aeroplane is in at the time?

You don’t even have to be born there. Just a parent.

What if you’re the child of English parents, one of whom served in the British Army based overseas at the time of your birth? I have two friends who were in that exact position when born. Was was born in Germany the other in Hong Kong. Does that mean one now has to identify as German and the...

Fuck me, that’s half the fan base discounted in one breath.

What if they move back to England again? Is the child still Irish? My brother was born in Ireland I was born in England, does this mean we’re not brothers as we’re different nationalities in your world?

There’s a heard of jersey cows very confused by you in a field near coventry.

I actually had a brexit supporting mate (very tongue in cheek I have to add) tell me if I don’t like brexit I can always fuck of back home. Back home to Northern Ireland presumably. He didn’t realise the difference or understand that the U.K. had a land border with the EU. Still doesn’t I think...

A year almost to the day after Maddy McCann went missing I was on holiday in Spain with my wife and eldest daughter who just turned one the week before. Maddy McCann went missing the week after my daughter was born. Anyway, we were in the hotel and it was about four in the morning and I awoke to...

Clearly he’s a glory boy.

I remember it well. I got shit at school because my mother spoke with a strong Northern Irish accent, accused of supporting terrorism was the favourite. The fact that I’m from the Protestant family with a long history of fighting the IRA as either RUC, PSNI, UDR and regular British army was...

Why am I automatically recalling this?

Some people take the minutest of things and make mountains out of them. Snowflakes. So David was born here to Irish parents who raised him to identify as Irish. So what. If you’ve got time and energy to get wound up by that you probably need to take up a hobby or something to fill the empty...

Or the next time you’re feeling horny and Mrs Otis says no just tell there’s no point in protesting.

Off course you can. It’s your choice and that’s exactly the point. WTF it’s got to do with anyone other than yourself how you choose to identify is beyond me.

How about the children who came here with their parents as part of the windrush generation, only ever attended school here, only ever worked here, only ever paid taxes here, only life they’ve ever known is here etc.

Am I still allowed to support Northern Ireland and England? I identify as British and not specifically Northern Irish or English and have always supported both.

That’s you and Boris then who identify as Turkish. Well, audience depending when it comes to Boris. Although Boris did spend large parts of his childhood being raised in Belgium too. So we have an American, Belgian, Turkish PM who invented the character Boris as you know him some time during his...