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That last wicket partnership I’d have bowled full and straight every ball. Can’t make a run and it’s undoubtedly harder to score a boundary than the short stuff. It was almost risk-free. Instead we’ve conceded 10 runs because we can’t dynamically alter the game plan.

Just bowl full and straight. This is ridiculous.

Went out for about 45 minutes and 4 wickets fall. Re Lyon, I’d imagine his series is done after this little cameo. Starc may as well swing the bat.

Shouldn’t necessarily be aiming to spend more. If the right targets are available at lower prices we should be looking to get them done. Ethan Laird is prime example in my opinion, great signing for sub-£1m.

I’d be amazed if there’s not a very thorough NCA investigation taking place in the background. Undoubtedly more to come on this.

Buy your own personalised cuff links from the club shop.

What a mess.

What the fuck do they put into Winviz to make it spit out England as clear favourites? And just as I type that, fucking horrendous shot from Bairstow. Bet Winviz still has us favourites.

The Aussies have realised we are desperate to score. Short balls will naturally bring about more air-time after a shot unless they’re left alone. Basically, we’re having a swipe at anything rather than letting the bowlers tire themselves out.

Oh dear.

Woke up this morning feeling ill Turns out Doug King is a shill We sang “SISU out” but is this really it? Something tells me I’m into something shit

How on earth do they manage to play in a stadium with 20,000 watching them each week then? Think this line of reasoning is pathetic.

And there’s the direct communication. Slightly disappointing.

Figured this from his initial interview. Spoke like he hadn’t got a clue.

To switch to a serious stance for a moment, I do think that’s fair. From the outside looking in he’s clearly ruffled a few feathers and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Time will tell whether he’s being overly/underly ambitious.

We’re signing McNally, Twine and Simms in swap deals for Vik. Planning to flog Everton a cardboard cutout and hope they don’t notice.

If we start the season having not signed a single player then I’ll remember to take my boots.

Heard it was Clint van Damme.

What on earth? He signed a long-term deal only 5 weeks back. Surely things can’t have soured that drastically in such a short timescale.

Heard on the grapevine Doug has gone full Charlie Methven and demanded we play Tiesto’s Adagio For Strings when the players walked out.