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I wish someone would.

I just tried that with my car and it came back with 'You've got to be joking!' :(

Not sure we want to see Shmmeee in a Batman costume stopping traffic on the M42 to be quite honest.

Yeah and you can get chancers and timewasters too. And you could sell it and a week or two later they come back complaining about something. At least if you sell to these types of places you've washed your hands of it and I don't mean in a palmed off a dud kind of way either.

Have you lost your head?

Two kids got knocked off their bikes doing just that yesterday.

I agree. I hate people like that. At best they are utter liars. At worst? Well, let's not go there.

Nowt official yet. Seems some journos maybe jumped the gun a bit. Think we are favourites though still.

Canute?

I won't take you up on it either. Would love to, but I can walk it in 45 minutes, so I am sure that someone more needy should be ahead of me in the rankings. :)

Yep. Document everything. Keep records of everything. If it were me personally I would try and get her on tape saying she is going to make things up with all this alleging threat. This is where my wife's friend got let down. Her husband hid cameras all over the house and then used the...

Oh, don't come shopping when I go then. All the cashiers talk to me. I just have one of those faces.

Took me ages to work that one out. I was thinking con fused? Electricity? Three pin?

Nope, me neither. The last place I would be taking a new woman would be to the house I shared with my newly separated wife. Talk about lighting the blue touchpaper. And Shmmeee, you are a complete arsehole for suggesting a half share of the house. How very dare you!

I am a totally non-violent guy, but I am angry for you too.

Yeah, agree, though it is probably far too late for that now.

I like Clint's idea of having a dump over a generic bowl. You might need a powerful electric fan though to spread it around a bit for full coverage.

Ahh, we always wish that and they always end up being a wet, cold night in February. ;)

Great advice there. So gutting when partners make accusations falsely against you. Not happened to me, but was right in the middle of my wife's friend's horrible encounter. That ended dreadfully. She even ended up in prison and has now not been allowed to see her kids at all for the past...

Best of luck. She has obviously taken advice and now got thoughts in her head. Surely 50/50 should always be the intented solution if it is at all possible. Hate all this 'see them every two weeks bollocks.' You spend every day with them and then suddenly you are supposed to just give all...