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Chalky's not only naturally distrusting but drinking alone in a fog of depression. What have you done to this man you monster?

I think we all now that's because SISU saved money on dictionaries by only including every second letter.

Ashdown's been paid by ACL to mount this smear campaign! FFS! Seyeclops666, don't worry - I don't find fiction emotional.

Your posts do come across as the work of a high-rolling city type.

Are people serious about this whole bribery/hush money thing? Really?

Chalky has issues trusting you by the sounds of that. Have you ever slept with his wife or girlfriend in the past?

As someone who's owned several Premier League clubs and dealt with stadium negotiations, I'd like you all to believe that I carry an extra authority on matters without question. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to my luxury yacht in Aruba.

I just realised you mean this.

Anyone got a big garden?

This seems unfortunate. https://twitter.com/OscarPistorius/status/273337050470678528 Nothing like getting home to hear the washing machine on and thinking its an intruder to go into full combat recon mode into the pantry! waa

How much was it?

I hope they do build one at Warwick Uni now, my parking's already paid for.

Intrigued, yes. Looking forward, not really. I'd rather not have all this uncertainty again, it's too soon.

There's a point. If this puts an end to Chelsea Dagger there's the first silver lining.

I was trying to think of something crackpipe-related, but pipedream's way better. You jerk.

If there's £30m knocking around, why are we not bidding for Falcao's leg?

You were just saying how 20000 people who did go to Crewe are fake in your other Pulitzer-nominated thread. Just who is safe from your badly-worded rage?

The police spokesman has said they were 'surprised' by the initial story of him mistaking her for a burglar, and it's a murder charge. There were reports of shouting from the address earlier in the evening and the police have investigated domestic incidents there before. Wow. (note: there are...

You're an idiot.

Play up you Ettington sky blues!