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Surely they would be 'Goo ga ga ga.'

Because we like to bring them in young and before Man U snap them up?

I'm the same with sperm.

We're going to be league champions by Halloween

Female Genital Reputation?

Pretty sure I've seen that video on PornHub.

Well done. I am so glad you have been able to find some positivity in your life, even though nothing of course can ever replace the love that you and your wife had between you. Good luck for the future.

Is the second prize 20 tickets?

Bit of both I think. With a splash of Messi and Lampard

But funnily enough, my daughter bought me a bottle of toffee apple cider for Fathers Day and I really liked it. Am I an alcoholic?

Sorry, was talking in past terms.

I can't keep up with your maths, mate.

Isn't that a bit like saying 'Besides knocking everyone out, was Mike Tyson a good boxer?'

Yeah. Possibly 18.

Cheers, Pipkin and I do of course remember your tale very well. How are you these days? I hope that you are still filled with warm memories of your misuss, but have also managed to find some happiness and positivity since in your life. Thank you for the kind words, they are much appreciated.

Fit your future - somewhere new, not your past - Not Wolves or Coventry.

At least he would be good at looking across the line for offsides, what with his ability to see over the top over all the players' heads.

Weird isn't it, because I can take cider and brandy, no problems, but red wine always gives me a headache.

Somali? Now that IS what I call pirate television.

Tiny mouthfuls.