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Kaka relies on Seb Hines to keep it shipshape at the back too. It was only when I saw him play in their first game that I realised he wasn't still on loan with us injured.

That's what I tell people when I'm playing football, but they have none of it.

I remember a home league game against Spurs around Christmas time one season that had no goals, but I still maintain that it's the finest 0-0 I ever did see. Paul Stewart was playing for them and they had a horrible yellow kit.

Not sure about who's best, but Hadji was the most technically gifted player I've probably seen represent us.

The Swansea guy? Rory Donnelly.

Which day are you closing shop there RFC?

All the best rap battles are won when one guy names a shop the other hasn't heard of.

The real issue is me - since Mowbray's been in charge we've had four home games, losing three and drawing one. I wasn't there for the draw. That's scientific fact.

If the imaginary ground feels close enough for me, it is. I'm not getting the maps out and drawing lines to decide.

Distribution is part of a goalkeeper's job, and he often overhits the ball. It's not quite snarling 'get out of the club' stuff, but it's definitely a valid criticism of any keeper.

I'd have rather kept Philips in than put Willis at rightback, he seems like a square peg in a round hole out wide.

They made a wise call in the end.

From the little I've seen of Ward, if he was with us for the season he'd walk that award.

Bit of an odd stick to beat him with, that.

We've had academics fall for those ransomware ones, including a professor who had to frantically cancel his credit card after entering the details so the 'police' could help him retrieve his computer from terrorists because you know how the police always charge you nowadays. THIS MAN IS IN...

Burge's reflex save late in the first half prevented us going into half-time a goal down, I can't fault him for yesterday apart from what seems to be his fixation on kicking directly to the opposite goalkeeper.

None of those are offensive terms. Who's telling you they are, and was this yesterday morning?

How much land do Rugby's council administer?

savosdad, is that you?

I'm no Wasps fan, but going mental over a piece of April Fools fluff that's essentially just copied and pasted from another site to begin with seems a little overboard.