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That's because only headless chickens run around aimlessly

Shmmeee Does Kiev

I thought that was Putin's job?

That's my point. I think the vaccinations will take us to that stage where it will be considered an acceptable level of deaths in relation to what else would be lost. As I said, we've all just got to hope we or our loved ones won't be one of those.

I think we're going to have one of the famous French meltdowns with a lot of animosity in the squad.

But in many cases it was. People went back out, to work etc and we had a second wave that killed tens of thousands. And once it's done there's no going back. If they're dead they're dead and you'll never see them again. If you're looking to strike a balance that is one fat bastard on the other...

I was the same with the football where they were socially distanced for team line-ups etc. When they were doing the guard of honour for Man City the players were stood well back and apart from one another and then within five minutes they were pretty much standing on each others toes defending...

Not a bad idea though. If we bought Ronaldo's right bollock and Messi's left then started an academy insemination programme two decades down the lines we're golden. Although I'm surprised we haven't got a team full of Ndlovu's right now. Actually, scrap that - much better idea. Buy Gary Breen's...

or Claret Bourbon?

Faded into obscurity playing Sunday League until about 15 when I became disillusioned with the game and concentrated on other avenues.

It could only have been better if he'd had another mate dressed as a busty blonde who he'd get distracted chasing after the virus and chase them instead. With another mate dressed as a toff chasing him waving money.

He's enjoying some fava beans and a nice chianti

To be honest though do you not reckon there'd be a load over here that'd be the same if Johnson said the same in a foreign country. Those from the left who'd just be quite happy for him to have gone away and those on the right outraged that he's not called wherever he is a backward shithole...

One snapped ACL (Automatic Construction Loom) and we're stuffed.

Another indication of how sad I was (well, let's be honest, am) is that I was trying to think of a way you could get names onto shirts that could them be removed/replaced if a player was sold or if a fickle child got a new favourite player or we signed someone. Loads of ideas, but none I felt...

I only got them cos the place we got them from (this was when other shops could sell them) a name was included for free on kids shirts. Once it became a cost extra I didn't get them on anymore (plus it'd have look a bit sad on someone who was 14). Hence why the only exception was the kit with...

As a kid I had my own name put on the back because I was worried if I had my favourite they'd end up getting sold. This was before transfer windows too. Yep, even as a kid I was a boring bastard thinking about the longer term.

Surprised they haven't put a stop to that with Covid. How many different hands are touching those cups? Hopefully the vaccine will stop the inevitable rise in infections resulting in hospitalisations and deaths.

I really can't see us staying in lockdown (which we're not truly in now anyway, just eased restrictions) for the backlog to be eased. I think the issue with the Nightingale hospitals was staffing. If you'd shoved every covid patient in them then all your doctors and nurses would have been there...

I thought you were supposed to for track and trace?