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This may be hard to fathom, but those two options you pulled from wherever you keep the hilarious nicknames aren't the only options. They're barely options at all, just a hypothetical you've invented to make terrible similes and lord it over people who are happy to watch a team currently...

They were ok to take your money, but I assume you did use the tickets too right? So the actual issue is that you're just not on file and they haven't stolen your cash.

Yes, the people who are happy to be able to attend a football match at home are very much like heroin addicts.

He seems like yesterday's news now. Let him have his little rants and flights of fancy, he'll sleep tonight bless him.

If they announced the Ricoh return and then said 'we'll still be playing the Gillingham game at Sixfields because we won't be fully prepared for demand yet' I'm sure that would have been accepted as a sensible solution by people.

I remember when Maradona was thrown out of the World Cup after traces of Dreamy Sleepy Nighty Snoozy Snooze were found in his system.

Why would people be asking what happened to a campaign designed with the goal of being back at the Ricoh?

If Mick Harford stuck around long enough to become attached to the club, he could have got it all sorted out with one stare.

They're also doing the thing where you can buy tickets in blocks of games for cheaper than buying individually, which is what was referred to when they said they'd help with alternatives.

There's something to look forward to.

The ticket thing is a mix of a rush and a demand not catered for in some time. The club didn't own the stadium before, so I can't see how too much can change otherwise.

I won't have people questioning Joey Essex's journalistic credentials. Didn't you see his documentary series where he went to Africa? They don't wear no shoes or nuffink.

The BBC give me a licence fee discount if I agree to snitch. I'm not sorry.

You said you'd given up supporting the club, so he's less a liar than you.

Fuck it, just set up a market stall instead yeah.

They're having trouble with a website that's already in place, but it'd take hours to set up a temporary ticket office?

https://twitter.com/Coventry_City/status/505379405569732608 Yep, the first two games at least which should give everyone plenty of time really.

I wasn't expecting the 3am campers and queues snaking round the retail park, and that's just on a weekday too.

I tried it around lunchtime with Chrome, it was specifically on the choose seat part that it stopped working. Might be better now though, that was peak rush apparently.