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Honestly, when we're looking for players being at fault for non-goals then I think we're being too harsh in our marking. Let he who has not been a fault for a non-goal throw the first stone.

Haven't played since - pulled my hamstring. Will try on Thursday. :) If my leg is no better I may suggest wanking football to the lads. Not sure what the rules will be, but I've got a few days to think them up.

There's a movie I like called 'Harvey'. It stars Jimmy Stewart and he thinks he can see a large white rabbit called Harvey. He says it's a pooka, which is a troll that can change into the form of any animal.

I'm not sure this is the best approach at this stage. See separate thread.

You're wrong. There were at least two trans as my friend Jeremy and I were both in drag. And one of their players with longish hair is a 'maybe' in my book.

I like your thinking Harvey. BTW, are you a pooka?

The players and the manager have been keen to stress how they are taking one game at a time whenever they get the chance to speak to the public. And there is little doubt that this strategy has worked well so far this season. However, I recall previous seasons when the team has also taken one...

Updated after today's game

Now that definitely looks like a player who's likely to be wanking during the game. Just hope he restricts his self-love to the dressing room; it may attract the attention of the ref if he starts off on the pitch.

Some stupid people might think that I made up this thread to be deliberately ridiculous to take the piss out of all the 'fans must do this' fascists. Not you though, you've seen right through me. I feel humbled.

As is every ground in the football league from my observations.

Guys, I'm sorry - I just realised why everyone is confused. I wrote this on my phone: bloody auto-correct! Anyway, it's not "wanking" I meant - I meant "cross-dressing".

Thanks. Could you please give us the names of all the others who were there too?

Why, oh why, oh why are there so many fans wanking, rather than watching the football during the game? For those of you who are wanking at home rather than getting yourselves over to Birmingham - stop giving yourselves hand pleasure and get over and support the boys! And to those who sit in...

Ring of Steel? How did your ring muscles get so fucking strong, that's what I want to know?

Thanks. But don't tell everyone as I'm shy and modest.

Good idea!

Christ, it's like watching a different side... one that's lost its last 7 games. My missus reckons we've taken bungs - because it's the only explanation she can find for the shite performance. Either that or Rotters are fucking brilliant and their superlative skills are causing us to be shite...

I'm also worried that Coriolanus could scupper our season. It's not performed often - what if it's suddenly put on in Stratford and it somehow disrupts our play?