mrtrench
Well-Known Member
Conor Thomas’s family has formed a 5-a-side team and have reached an agreement to play their home games at the Ricoh next season. Conor’s Uncle, who famously leaked the news that they would be ‘playing at the Ricoh’ via the Social Networking site Twitter, was overjoyed with the news.
‘We’ve been working on our 5-a-side team for months’, said Uncle Fred – barely able to keep the grin from his face. ‘The Ricoh is a fabulous stadium and we can’t wait to start playing there... between 8 and 9 on Thursday evenings.’ It is understood that the Thomas family will play across one half of the pitch using a 1-4 formation and their legendary ‘pressing’ style, with Conor’s sister, young starlet Jenny, playing in the hole. Uncle Fred is looking for other family members sharing the same Thomas DNA.
However not everyone was quite so positive: Aunty Joy has already made negative comments about the £3 per player subs that must be paid to ACL to use the pitch – suggesting that she may withhold her subs unless she is given the revenues from the coffee machines during the hour that the Thomas family will be playing.
‘We need the revenues in order to go out for a pint after the game’, explained Joy’s spokesman Timmy Mallett. ‘If that is not forthcoming, we will move our games to another part of the country – possibly Northumberland’. Timmy refused to expand on these plans, instead shouting ‘Whackadoo’ as he repeatedly hit the Thomas family with a huge foam mallet.
Bryan Richardson is 70.
‘We’ve been working on our 5-a-side team for months’, said Uncle Fred – barely able to keep the grin from his face. ‘The Ricoh is a fabulous stadium and we can’t wait to start playing there... between 8 and 9 on Thursday evenings.’ It is understood that the Thomas family will play across one half of the pitch using a 1-4 formation and their legendary ‘pressing’ style, with Conor’s sister, young starlet Jenny, playing in the hole. Uncle Fred is looking for other family members sharing the same Thomas DNA.
However not everyone was quite so positive: Aunty Joy has already made negative comments about the £3 per player subs that must be paid to ACL to use the pitch – suggesting that she may withhold her subs unless she is given the revenues from the coffee machines during the hour that the Thomas family will be playing.
‘We need the revenues in order to go out for a pint after the game’, explained Joy’s spokesman Timmy Mallett. ‘If that is not forthcoming, we will move our games to another part of the country – possibly Northumberland’. Timmy refused to expand on these plans, instead shouting ‘Whackadoo’ as he repeatedly hit the Thomas family with a huge foam mallet.
Bryan Richardson is 70.
