Its OK not to be OK (12 Viewers)

Perennial Lurker

Well-Known Member
I've lost 4 people who were part of my life in differing capacities in my life and each has had a huge impact on me .
I proudly wear one of the "dear person behind me " hoodies and do as much as I can to promote male mental health .
Our quiz team won the Xmas play your cards right in one of our locals on Thursday, was about £500 and we put half of it straight in the charity tin supporting male mental health .

We still as a society don't do enough , we men hurt and sometimes feel inadequate. More needs to be done.

My favourite quote is I would rather you talk to me if you need to rather than me talking about you at your funeral.

Any one of you on here ever need an ear please DM me
 
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Deity

Well-Known Member
We also need to normalise seeing a therapist. Still such a stigma about it but, if you go to the gym or have a trainer work on every other muscle in your body, why not your brain and mental health?

I saw one a year or two and was incredible. Bit stressed recently so going to get started again.

Well said Robbie.

In the US it’s relatively common place now to see a therapist ( if you can afford to do so ). The barrier there is much less social and more economic. In the UK I think we still have both barriers.

My best mate and I have a simple question we ask each other when we want to check in “ how are you feeling this week ?” We both know it gives permission for a more honest response than “ how’s your week been ?”

We have been best mates for 40 years but only started to talk about stuff like this in the last 2-3 years. Crazy I know but this simple question helps us both.
 

shmmeee

Well-Known Member
We also need to normalise seeing a therapist. Still such a stigma about it but, if you go to the gym or have a trainer work on every other muscle in your body, why not your brain and mental health?

I saw one a year or two and was incredible. Bit stressed recently so going to get started again.

You’re American aren’t you? I think private therapists are a different beast to what most people experience through IAPT on the NHS. I know if I’d given up after my first couple of NHS therapists I’d have gone away believing therapy was worse than useless. Finding a private therapist who I could trust made all the difference. Agree with you, he gave me tools to handle things and my MH has never been back (touch wood) to the levels it was. Of course divorce helped there, but even that he was hinting at in hindsight.
 

shmmeee

Well-Known Member
I would also say male mental health is very different from female in my opinion and a lot of talking therapy is set up for women. Finding someone who ideally is a bloke but at least understands how to talk to them is huge IMO. Shop around people. Don’t assume the first second or even third experience is what they’re all like.

This is what I used when looking:

 

Terry_dactyl

Well-Known Member
I would also say male mental health is very different from female in my opinion and a lot of talking therapy is set up for women. Finding someone who ideally is a bloke but at least understands how to talk to them is huge IMO. Shop around people. Don’t assume the first second or even third experience is what they’re all like.

This is what I used when looking:

There’s a ton of evidence that supports that talking therapies help. Also a ton of evidence that supports that the most important aspect of any therapy is the relationship between therapist and person going to see them.
 

covcity4life

Well-Known Member
Talk to someone. But then as I found out expect to get it thrown in your face on SBT when you argue about the meaning of the word mediocre...

Talk to a counceller guys. It does help. Unfortunately you can't trust people on here as nice as it would be to be able to do that.
 

MTK

Well-Known Member
Some great messages on here. As a woman, it’s pretty routine for me and my friends to talk to each other if we are upset or stressed about something. I think we all feel it’s natural to be in that position from time to time. Do we do it proactively enough, I’m not sure. Likewise do we all do it when we really need to. I know the talk happens often enough to know it really helps. I really like that question above, how are you feeling this week? It’s really open and welcoming of a proper conversation about how you’re feeling.
 

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