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Worst strikers ever... (1 Viewer)

  • Thread starter Jimmy Hill's Chin
  • Start date Sep 9, 2011
Forums New posts
J

Jimmy Hill's Chin

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #1
The ones who couldn't hit a cow's backside with a banjo...

Here's a few for starters...

John Gayle (bambi on ice)
Graham Barrett
Onandi Lowe
Sebastian Olszar
Nii Lamptey
Trevor Benjamin
Lee Mills
Jairo Martinez
Gary Madine (although he does appear to be doing well at Sheffield Weds)
Craig Bellamy (for being such a bellend)
 

Ernie Machin

New Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #2
All shockers.

Add to that, Dean Holdsworth.
 

ICHAN

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #3
John Williams .
 
W

wonderfulwill90

New Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #4
In all fairness, Onandi Lowe 1 goal in 2 games is not a bad effort.
 
J

Jimmy Hill's Chin

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #5
I once met John Williams' missus who was a barmaid at one of my University's campus bars
 
D

DiveDiveWhereverYouMayBe

New Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #6
I hope no-one mentions the inspiration for my name (Simon Haworth - basically shit striker but somehow won four or five freekicks with blatant dives and ingratiated himself with my basic skullduggery).

We'e had several underwhelming professionals in all positions. Up front is no different. I could be wrong, but a name which bounced right into view was Kyle Lightbourne. Trevor Benjamin was also fairly horrible.
 

Adam Jones

New Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #7
Dean Holdsworth is the worst I've ever seen by an absolute mile. 17 games and never scored a single goal for us. The worst of it was that he never even looked like scoring. He was virtually immobile.
 

ICHAN

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #8
roy wegerle, just read his wiki link and it says he left after his contract ended, for some reason I always thought he went off to play for america or a holiday and just never came back.
 
J

Jimmy Hill's Chin

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #9
Wegerle was a class player and doesn't deserve to be in this list of clowns.

Holdsworth was a decent player for Wimbledon but by the time he came to us he was a crock - similar to Mick Harford several years before.

I don't like to include current players in lists like this but I don't think ROD or Clive Platt would look out of place in this low-grade company unless they start hitting the onion bag shortly. Robbie Simpson is another who was very average.
 
D

DiveDiveWhereverYouMayBe

New Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #10
'Wegerle was a class player and doesn't deserve to be in this list of clowns'

100% this /\
 

ICHAN

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #11
9 goals in 53.
However did he just not return from where ever he went or am i just imagining that? I am sure he did though, anyone help on that one please?
 

rob9872

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #12
If we're talking value for money then Drinkell has to be right up there at £800k back then. Hughes and Bellamy could be included but we did recoup and times were different.
 
D

DiveDiveWhereverYouMayBe

New Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #13
And I may give you ROD, but I think Platt gets a bad rap. When he's bad, he's very bad. When he's good, he's... well, he's not as bad as some of the others mentioned. I met ROD in Leamington not so long ago and his passion for making something of his second chance with Cov was endearing. I wish he was a bit better on the pitch (you never know, impromptu purple patch, maybe?!), likeable lad.
 
J

Jimmy Hill's Chin

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #14
Not sure about where he ended up but he wasn't really an out and out striker, iirc. More of an attacking midfielder thus explaining the relatively low goal total.
 
G

georgehudson

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #15
worst striker ever...

I seem to remember that we had some bloke from WBA on loan, played 1 game, & was 'a bag of p**h', might have been paul williams, ???
 

ICHAN

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #16
Ok I will withdraw wegerle for you all, however can anyone shed any light on my question regarding him please? not where he ended up but on did he never return for some reason even though he was still under contract with us?
 

ICHAN

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #17
Nah paul williams won that speed test thing they did at wembley once on cup final day or something and he won so we signed him oh those were the days when we would sign anyone.
 
J

Jimmy Hill's Chin

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #18
Not as if our strikers during our later Premiership years were always much cop. Paul Hall, Andrew Ducros, Iyseden Christie for example were all abject.
 
D

DiveDiveWhereverYouMayBe

New Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #19
'Paul Hall, Andrew Ducros, Iyseden Christie'

Why weren't these shouted up when we were all pulling our hair out about a lack of options up front? I would have felt immediately better that they were off the wage bill. Ducros and Christie were kids, but the mention of Jamaican international Paul Hall got my heckles up on sight, so he must have been toss.
 
Last edited: Sep 9, 2011

Ernie Machin

New Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #20
John Williams was the guy that won the 100m for players thingy at Wembley.

And I won't have a bad word said about Mick Harford. A goal a game ratio. Subs appearance, I believe. He was also nails.
 

Ernie Machin

New Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #21
I liked Ducros, he was just too little. A breeze of wind would knock him off the ball.
 

rob9872

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 9, 2011
  • #22
Andy Ducros was a product of the youth team. Admittedly he was woefully short but was barely a kid and certainly doesn't deserve to end up in a list like this, it's the staff who pick them before they're ready that take the hit for that in my mind. As for Wegerle lol he would make my top ten list of favourite strikers in my time watching CCFC. Frustrating sure (remember Leeds anyone?) but oozed class.
 

Ernie Machin

New Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #23
Wegerle was great, like Le Tissier but good looking.

[video=youtube;TOUaDs_55E4]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOUaDs_55E4[/video]
 

ICHAN

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #24
Can you remember if he did not return for some reason though rob or has the mind totally gone now.
 
G

georgehudson

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #25
worst striker ever...

Just found it, Paul A Williams, season 92-93, on, loan from WBA, utterly dreadful, 2'ish games, (h) chelsea, (a) leeds, no goals, donkey hee haw
 

rob9872

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #26
I can't sorry mate. Culd probably Google it but I'm not sure I could hit the right keys with what I've consumed tonight
 
C

CaptainPMH

New Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #27
Kevin Kyle. A glaring ommission surely!
Matt Jansen, Jamie McMaster?
 
C

covlad1986

New Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #28
CaptainPMH said:
Kevin Kyle. A glaring ommission surely!
Matt Jansen, Jamie McMaster?
Click to expand...

I agree with you on Kevin Kyle as i use to call him a lump of wood (that the ball just hits of him)
 

AngryAnt

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #29
To be fair to Kevin Kyle it wasn't his fault that he was on so much money or that Mickey Adams signed him in a blind panic.
He was rubbish though and his only redeeming feature was when he dragged that faking player off the pitch who refused to get up.

Kyle lightborne and bellend are the two for me.
 

Disorganised1

New Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #30
Bellend ! Never saw a player miss so many one on ones.

Saw Andy DuCros playing for Nuneaton and he was bossing the game - till he got sent off.
 
N

Neilhanx

New Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #31
I just wanted to mention the frustrating Robert Rosario..... Brian Clough's last ever signing
 
W

wingy

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #32
Neilhanx said:
I just wanted to mention the frustrating Robert Rosario..... Brian Clough's last ever signing
Click to expand...

Thought he improved when they gave him the armband and converted to midfield:thinking about:
 

Otis

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #33
Kevin Kyle surely has to be right up there.

Anyone remember Chris Chilton?

Scored 193 goals in 415 games for Hull (a goal every 2.15 games average) and then managed just 3 in 27 (1 in every 9) for us.

The Sky Blue curse effect strikes yet again!! :facepalm:
 

speedie87

Well-Known Member
  • Sep 10, 2011
  • #34
i appreciate not many ppl would have seen this lad, but if anyone was unfortunate enough to be at Rotherham when Mcallister was manager on a freezing cold day to see this lad please back me up.

Christian Yulu

The lad couldn't even run!
 
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