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  1. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    Poll the general election

    She'll shut the fish counter down without any consultation with management simply because she doesn't like fish and move across to the bakery because she likes the uniform, and the French sticks.
  2. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    Poll the general election

    Swinson will resign by the weekend and will be working at her local Morrisons fish counter thereafter.
  3. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    If we win the replay, who do we want ?

    Forget the third round, we're already through comfortably. Arsenal away 0-1 to the sky blues , round 4. The football world will take note . You heard it here first.
  4. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    Do you mean "if he is shagging Dianne Abbott, it will take no longer than it takes to have a piss. " ?
  5. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    That labour activist should be arrested for not hitting him.
  6. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    I think we can say that the meltdown has already started. Far too much Co2 being pumped out on here and it's environmentally bad.
  7. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    I couldn't give a shite about the thoughts of millions of muslims or any other religion until they try and impose their ways on me or use their God as an excuse to kill men women and children in my own country. You talk a lot of intellectual tosh for the complete sake of it. It's good to know...
  8. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    ..as per last night's election debate with a curious under 30s only audience many of whom were still in nappies.
  9. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    It depends doesn't it on whether they are referring to the person or the clothing. Let's face it, it's all a bit unhealthy and it depends on the age or primary or secondary. I use to get called a wanker for wearing a coat with toggles on at secondary school. Now I'm a wanker in my own right...
  10. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    It is almost exactly the same shape as a letterbox, hence the analogy. I wear a balaclava when I go winter cycling (it has holes where the eyes and mouth go) . I look a bit like a terrorist, usually the IRA I've been told. Shock, horror. How outrageous. Big difference between referring to...
  11. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    So as long as he has the conviction in what he says you'll vote for him, irrespective of what it is he actually says. Well done, top marks for that logic. Who waves a Union Jack ? Nigel Farage ?- there's a leader better than all of them . He has the conviction but can also crack jokes at the...
  12. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    Good for you. There's always Dianne Abbot to fall back on to do number bonds to 10.
  13. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    If we win the replay, who do we want ?

    Arsenal at the Emirates. They are there for the taking. Big City following, big pay day, move on the the 4th round.
  14. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    Yes, on the one hand there's the smiley and completely vacant Swinson and on the other there's the hugely charismatic and forthright Jezza. A real plethora of great leaders right now.
  15. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    Can you be a bit more specific ?
  16. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    And let's face it, the rest of the candidates are absolutely piss poor. He's the best option because the rest of them are various versions of the Monster Raving Lib Dems.
  17. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    Hahah yes, but in the context of the dross that's come before Andrew Neil in the last week or so , this was , at last, someone who seemed to be able to actually have some answers and wasn't at all intimidated.
  18. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    Unanimous then . Farage for PM.
  19. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    Yes you're right. It hasn't quite got the texture nor colour right . Looks like a blow torch has been applied for a split second and it's gone crinkled. That, or it's from his bollocks.
  20. Alan Dugdales Moustache

    General Election 2019 thread

    Has Andrew Neil got a small wig on top or has he had some bits of cotton actually sewn in ? I tend to think it's sewn in .
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