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Torchy (Simon) mate, for once I am completely without words. Almost. I guess you know that despite the fact that everyone here hates your guts because you secretly love SISU, we're also your mates, right. :) As a mate, all I can say is this - if there's anything trivial you need taking care...

I don't really mind, as long as I go peacefully in my sleep like my granddad, not kicking and screaming like the passengers in his car. :)

In fairness there's a pretty reasonable theory that says you should always play your best players in the position that they're best in. By moving Stokes to CB and bringing in an (arguably) weaker LB, you could actually weaken both positions rather than just the problem one at CB. I'm not...

A thing of rare beauty, but if you polish it any more you're going to wear the paint off. There are surgical instruments that aren't as well cleaned as that car. :) Is that a standard rear windscreen, may I ask? I've not seen one like that before...

Is that not one of the prettiest cars ever (I think that's a TR4A below). That was £25 well-spent, sir. :)

OK, I'll confess - the first record I was given was The Planets by Holst. That was when I was ten by a teacher (at Templars, I'm not posh!). I still love Classical music. First pop record I'll admit to buying was Squeeze, Up The Junction, on pink vinyl. Went through rock (Deep...

Maori nose flute interpretations of prog rock classics for me, man and boy. Why would anyone want to listen to anything else? :)

If I remember rightly you'll probably both have to complete claim forms that explain the circumstance of the accident, but your first step is definitely to inform your insurer. When it comes to it, if they do write the car off they used to be reasonably happy for you to retain the vehicle for...

Sometimes they use 'and' twice in the same sentence too. :) But yes, joking aside, proof reading on the CET isn't wot it waz. Streching the 'pennis' being a case in point.

Absolutely. What it really means is that the paper starts to rely on republishing PR pieces verbatim along with things to encourage their advertisers. I don't think the problem with the CET is with the individual journalists...

Otis, I sense some dry humour here... Anyway, I for one would welcome our new insect overlords, and I’d like to remind them that as a trusted member of SkyBluesTalk I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves.

I used to try this regularly, until my dad told me I'd go blind. I asked if I could just do it until I needed glasses.

Yeah, our place is a bit like that. Fair enough if it was built in Tudor times I guess, but ours was knocked out in 1974! I'm assuming the brickies used their spirit levels as cricket bats.

Absolutely. Isn't it strange, I must have gone past there literally thousands of times, but I'd never really noticed the beauty of the building perched on the shop/takeaway/pub. Just goes to show that you never really appreciate what's on your doorstep...

I'd love to nip out for a pint, but I'm worried that if I stand too close to HH I'll get pregnant. :)

Any way you stack it, that has to be classed as assault - he doesn't even have the pretence of trying to play the ball, it's about 30 yards away! I suspect the police will get involved at some point...

Yep, fwiw mate I don't really bother with Tipsters. The best ones, imho, probably get paid by the papers for it. Over a year, there usually isn't one of them who turns a profit... http://www.besttipping.com/betdaqtipcheck/?action=allcompare&time=360&amount=10

Don't think they can do it, Nick. Too dangerous. As I understand it these days, you're not even allowed to continue a pursuit if the rider becomes too erratic and a possible danger to himself. Can't see why they can't take their registrations and follow it up later though. Give the house a...

I've spent quite a bit of time trading on betfair, mostly on the immediate pre-race horse markets using a tool called Bet Angel. That's got some built in tools for creating bots using your own strategies and tied into Excel, but I've never entirely trusted them because it can expose you to a...